Friday Hodgepodge

Four Things

1. File under Things That Make It Hard to Keep a Straight Face: "You're a bad Daddy! You're going to jail!"

Mom and Dad in jail. Little Man has been known to send us both there at once. (Image courtesy of Pixabay.)

That's how my son, now four, has been reacting to decisions he deems unacceptable lately.

A close second happened as I was dropping him off at daycare on a day he wasn't in the mood. He had his Maui hook in hand and, as I was about to unbuckle him from his car seat, he threatened me with it. I somehow managed a stern demeanor as I said, "You're not hitting anybody with that," and took it away from him.

2. From a story about Hurricane Harvey, I learned about a redeeming quality of the fire ants seen floating around in huge mats:

Whoever lives will have the land all to themselves. There is at least one possible upside: Fire ants love to eat ticks. The area where the fire ants landed may be crawling with stinging ants for a while. "But it'll have absolutely no ticks. So it'll be lovely from that perspective," says [entomologist Alex] Wild.

Living near all the deer I do, and thanks to anti-vaxxers, having some fire ants around would be a welcome development: I wouldn't have to worry about Lyme disease.

3. The following passage, about Premier League fandom in America, brings back Boston memories, thanks to a fellow Gooner:

"My origin story comes from watching my baby daughter on Saturday mornings 10 years ago to let my wife get some additional sleep," said Arsenal fan Brian Kelly. "As a sports fan, it's great to have world-quality athletics on at 7:45 a.m."

Back in Boston, I enjoyed either seeing the games at home as early as 6:45, while holding a sleeping baby or watching Pumpkin crawling around. Or, better yet, enjoying a later game over brunch with her and my wife at a sports bar within walking distance.

And why am I an Arsenal fan? One year when I was in high school, my dad coached my team. He chose the name upon a gun shop agreeing to become our uniform sponsor.

4. And speaking of kids, the following passage from a list of of "Five Types of Moms You Meet in the Office" made me chuckle more than once:

She has infant twins, or a baby and a toddler, or three kids under five. You've met her, or maybe you've even been her. She has dark circles under her eyes, and guzzles coffee. She looks forward to Monday because she can go to the bathroom by herself. When one kid gets sick, you know she'll be working at home for a week because kids never get sick at the same time -- each one will have to have their turn.

I am happy to report that having kids two years apart has gotten noticeably easier over the past couple of years.

-- CAV